How it Feels When Your Relationship Seems One-Sided
First off, let me distinguish between the words, "seem" and "is". These two words mean very different things and, especially in the case of this writing, mean a world of difference in what I'm talking about.
Let me be the first to say that I'm not only autistic/Asperger's, but I deal a lot with depression and low self-esteem. These three things alone aren't a great combination, but when you mix in a relationship with the usual ups and downs, it can be a deadly combination for me.
I've been in many a relationship where it seems as if things are one-sided--that when it comes right down to it, the other person's needs, wants and desires seem to come first.
That turns out to often times not be the case, but as I said before, what seems to be and what actually is, are two entirely different beasts.
I can't even begin to count the number of times over the years where I've felt neglected, disappointed and hurt because I felt like things were always going the other person's way and that my feelings, needs or wants didn't matter.
More often than not, I was wrong about how things really were. That's not to say that my feelings at the time weren't valid, but in the end it turned out that I wasn't always correct and that I had let my depression and self-esteem problems get in the way of clear thinking.
As I've gotten older, though not necessarily wiser, I've come to realize this more and more. When we let depression, fear of rejection and low self-esteem take control instead of keeping a level head, things can go from not so bad to completely horrible in the sna